[00:00:00] Welcome to the Rebecca Adehill Podcast. I wanna start off by saying that I want my name to remind you to go and live your life big, to take risks, to go all in and write one hell of a story with one life. You know that you have. I'm a seven-figure business mentor, wife and mother of three, and I'm here to share my journey with you as I am constantly moving in the direction of more, more bigness, more impact, more wealth, more depth, and more life.
[00:00:30] My aim with this podcast is to activate and inspire you to go and live your life big in the fullest, most passionate way. I'm so glad that you are here, so let's dive right in. Hello everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Rebecca Ada Hill podcast. I am so glad to be back here for another episode.
[00:00:50] I hope that you are having the most magical start to your week. I am celebrating so many things. We are almost two weeks into [00:01:00] August, but I just wanna take a moment and really reflect on the incredible month that I had last month. Not only financially, but looking at the type of people that I'm moving into my world right now.
[00:01:13] And there is so much movement happening around me and I'm just paying very close attention to all of it, and I am just soaking in so much gratitude. For what is happening in my life right now. And one thing that I just wanna highlight, that I am very much in control in all of the things that I'm celebrating.
[00:01:35] They didn't just happen. I didn't just wake up one day and whoops, here we are. I worked for them. I was very intentional for all of the things to happen, and the results that I am getting is simply a by product of the actions that I take and the person I am and the way I lead myself. A conversation I wanna have with you today is around [00:02:00] rejection.
[00:02:00] Probably one of the biggest fears the most entrepreneurs faces as they are leading themselves in the online world or running their own businesses. So they are extremely scared of people telling them, no, no, I don't wanna work with you. No, you are too expensive. No, it doesn't feel like a good fit.
[00:02:21] I've decided to go with someone else, or they don't say anything at all. They completely ghost you. And I have a lot of conversations with my clients around this particular topic and something that I actually wanna share with you is how I personally navigate rejection and how I've managed to completely overcome any bad feelings towards
[00:02:43] being rejected or people not wanting to work with me or think that I'm X, Y, and Z, whatever that looks like that now, I can wholeheartedly say that I am completely neutral when people say no to working with me, or when they think that I'm too expensive or when they can't see the value or [00:03:00] whatever it might be,m
[00:03:00] I can be completely neutral and say that is all okay. The first thing that I wanna share with you is what are we making it mean when we are being rejected? If someone drops into your DMs wanting to work with you, and then they decide that they choose not to, do you take that to heart? Do you take it to heart when you don't get it the way you had hoped for?
[00:03:23] Are you making it mean that you are not good enough? Are you making it mean that they don't wanna work with you? Because you are too expensive. Are you making it mean that your prices are too expensive? What are you actually making it mean? When someone says, "No, I choose not to work with you right at this moment", that is your first checking point, is to see what comes up for you
[00:03:44] when someone says no, do you lean even harder in and trying to convince them to work with you or do you let it go? Do you feel like your ations start to change? When you get rejected, what actually happens? What comes up for you? When someone says [00:04:00] no? That is a very good indication to see where you are at and where some work needs to be done.
[00:04:05] And today, I wanna give you some tools in terms of how I would completely neutralize this feeling. And I could not care if I get a hundred no's per day or if I get one, no no's. Or whatever it might be. It does not affect me because here is what I know to be true. I can't control other people's actions, and the moment I do, I give my power away.
[00:04:30] And something that you will hear me say a lot is to bring the power back to you. Bring the power back to you, back into your body, back to you. So when we are selling an offer, or a product or a service, whatever it might be, and people say no, if you are making it mean that you are simply not good enough, we need to dig a little bit deeper here because that is actually not what they are saying, what [00:05:00] they are saying.
[00:05:01] is you have not shown me enough value. You have not shown me that it's safe for me to invest in you. You have not shown me that there is a desire for me to say yes, or I am not willing to make this a priority right now. That every time someone says no, the first thing that I do is to check in and see whether there is a level of me that could have showed more value.
[00:05:27] Or if my offer is optimized enough in order for them to make it a priority and are willing to invest money and time to come and work with me. So if the answer is no, that is data to me. That is data to me why people do or don't make it a priority. The second thing that because a lot of people, they stop selling because they don't wanna get a no.
[00:05:52] And I find that extremely interesting. They don't wanna bother people. They don't wanna come across as salesy. They don't wanna push them. Maybe people will [00:06:00] find you annoying, maybe people will think this or they will think that the stories goes on. And I'm thinking to myself, if people find me annoying, wouldn't they just unfollow me?
[00:06:08] So the second thing here is the assumptions that you make about your audience. When you sell, if you think and go in with the thought that you are going to disturb them, annoy them, make them frustrated, make them unfollow you, and your actions are actually dictated by that belief. You need to change the way you view your audience.
[00:06:31] Here is what I think. Every single time I post on Instagram or I sit here and record a podcast or I show up on stories, I picture that every single one of you, including you listening to this right now, is, "oh my gosh. I cannot wait to hear Rebecca speak. I cannot wait until she uploads a story. I cannot wait to hear from her.
[00:06:53] I cannot wait to see what her next offering is". That is how I view my audience like. Every [00:07:00] single one of you are ready to buy from me today. If you start to change your assumptions about your audience, you will start to lead yourself very differently with a whole lot more certainty than what you probably are doing right now.
[00:07:15] The second thing, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. Every single time someone says no to working with me, I take a screenshot of that and I have a folder on my phone that I save every single person that have said no to working with me. I can't afford it. Not now. Maybe later, maybe next year. I can't see enough value or they ghost me completely.
[00:07:39] I save them. I save them and I have a little folder on my phone in the photo section that says rejections. And then I go in there every single week and I look through them and sometimes I have a little giggle because there was a time where I charged $3,000 for three months worth of private mentoring when I first started.
[00:07:59] And there was some [00:08:00] people back then that thought that was too expensive that could simply not make it a priority. And today I laugh at that because compared to I have more than 10x that now to work with me privately, which makes me crack up because back then that was a stretch for me and like looking at the evolution for my past, you know, just over two years now, it's been phenomenal.
[00:08:21] But it's beautiful for me to actually go back and look at these screenshots and for people saying no. And I actually use that as a bit of fire. I use that as a bit of fire to go, I'm gonna keep on moving no matter what. Remember all of those people who said no to working with me, and now they're gonna wish, oh my gosh.
[00:08:39] Imagine having Rebecca to herself for three months, for three grand. I'll take 10. That's how I look at it now. So there is no emotional connection. Other than a little laugh and a little giggle and a little fire to go and continue to move and grow and impact. Because what I'll notice by looking at all of these screenshots, it's [00:09:00] actually my own evolution, which is really, really powerful.
[00:09:03] And some people that said no to me two years ago, they are still around today and maybe they are still making up their mind to work with me, and that is okay because I cannot control when the time is right for them. So all I do is to focus on the things that I can control. So I thought I would let you in on that.
[00:09:21] So if you don't have a folder on your phone right now where you are saving all of the messages, where people are saying no to working with you, please do that because you'll look back at that in one day and it will actually bring you a lot of joy. Another thing when it comes to rejection that I always believe that that is energetic protection.
[00:09:41] Every time someone says, no, it's not the time. No, I don't wanna work with you. I believe that the universe got my back every single time. Every time someone says, no, I don't wanna work. With you or that's a bit of a stretch for me. I know that that's the universe going, "Rebecca, I've got your back. This person is not aligned, or this was not meant to be right now.
[00:10:00] I believe every single time that is energetic protection for me. Every single time it's protection and redirection. So every time one door closes and new one will open. And if I can't see any new doors open around me, I will go and create my own door and I will step through it. What you'll find in my pattern now is that I move no matter what I move, no matter what, and I only control the things I can control.
[00:10:27] I have people drop into my DMs on a weekly to let me know that they are struggling, that they are being rejected. No one wants to work with them. They don't have any clients signing up or they stuck in a situation they don't wanna be in, or they have been rejected, whatever it might be. I see you. I hear you.
[00:10:44] But bring the power back to you. Power back to you, back into your body. Stand in your power. Stand in your power. People that stand in their power, they don't focus on things they can't control. If I did that, that would completely drain my energy. [00:11:00] So what I do do is simply focus on the things that I can control, so I can control what I do from that point moving forward.
[00:11:07] And every time someone says no to me, that is incredible data. Also incredible data for me to analyze and look at the reasons, especially when they give you the reason why and when you are able to actually read in between the lines when someone says, I don't have the time right now, you know that it's not a time issue.
[00:11:30] Just ask them to go on the screen time on their phone and see how many hours they spent on Instagram. We all know it's not a time issue, it's a priority. And often what it actually comes down to is people's ability to be able to trust themselves. It comes down to a control thing.
[00:11:49] So they feel in that moment that they are giving their power away and that feels unsafe for them. So what I can control and [00:12:00] showing them along the way, and I choose to show my leadership before people have paid me. Someone, someone says, "oh, Rebecca, that's a bit too stretchy for me". Here is my reply.
[00:12:10] Absolutely. I get it. I definitely do not want investing to cause you any stress or overwhelm or discomfort. I want this next chapter of yours to feel exciting. I want it to feel like a really beautiful edge that you are ready to meet on your own terms, when the time is right for you, and then I'll lean back because it is not up to me to tell them when they are ready to tell them how to lead them.
[00:12:40] So what I can show them is how I lead myself, and hopefully that will evoke a feeling or two within them that will spark something within them to go far out. I wish I could lean myself and move the way Rebecca does. Her confidence and her ability to keep on moving, no matter what, that is what I can control.
[00:13:03] And I wanna show my potential clients, they have my full support before they have paid mw. Connection before transaction. Connection before transaction. And in that connection part, I show my leadership and that is the number one reason why people move so quickly into my world. When you are a person that lead yourself no matter what, when you are a person that can show your leadership without saying, this is me in my leadership, it's a felt sense.
[00:13:37] People are gonna be drawn to you, but if they don't feel that certainty within you, you are not going to be a safe bet. So often what the conversation is about here, when people say no to working with you, I want you just to hold up a mirror for a second and gently ask yourself, how are you leading yourself?
[00:13:58] How rock solid are [00:14:00] you? How anchored are you? How embodied are you? Are you asking people to move without you actually moving? Does your words actually match the actions that you take and the moves that you are making? What you are claiming? Something that I live by is to keep my life and business clean.
[00:14:18] You hear me say that a lot. My clients, they know if they're listening to this, they're probably gonna have a giggle. My team, they know I like things clean, clean communication, clean boundaries. It's a, it's a clean flow. When people come into my world, it's clean. I practice what I preach. I implement my own strategies before I teach them.
[00:14:39] I keep it clean. I don't discount my services because I keep it clean. Everything is clean, everything is even, everything is clean. So I wanted to have a little check-in right now. How clean, and I'm not meaning actually clean. How clean are you right now? How clean is your business? How clean are your [00:15:00] processes?
[00:15:00] Because once you keep it clean, once you keep it clean and open and grounded, And instead of saying more, you simply be more, show them, make them feel something. Give them more of that certain energy that they so deeply crave, and you can be that pillar and anchor for them until they can be that for themselves.
[00:15:24] So next time you are being rejected, here is what I want you to do. I want you to take a moment and analyze the message that you received. Is there any truth in this? Can I read between the lines here and actually see what they are saying? Can I, for a moment, put myself in their position and see if their opinion and their point of view is actually valid in this moment?
[00:15:49] Is this an opportunity for me to improve something about my business or my offerings? The second thing, I wanted to take a screenshot and add it to a rejection folder on [00:16:00] your phone, the most powerful folder that brings me a lot of joy. And you know what the beautiful thing is? The longer I do this, the fewer screenshots I need to add to that folder.
[00:16:11] I actually don't need to add so many screenshots anymore, and I know there was a lot more in the beginning. Now not so many. And I know that comes down to my leadership, who I am and how I move. I know the people are ready when they do reach out to me. They have been watching, they have been watching. They have been analyzing, they have been feeling, I've evoked a feeling or two within them.
[00:16:35] So when they do drop in, they are ready. There is no convincing, there is no trying to prove to them why they should come into my world. They just know. They drop in and go, Rebecca, I am ready. I am ready. Don't take it to heart. Next time someone rejects you, I want you to treat it like you are the most brilliant CEO of your company, making really empowered [00:17:00] decisions that have the ability to zoom out and analyze the actual situation, and also know that every time you get rejected, that is a beautiful redirection to something greater.
[00:17:13] I hope that you have loved today's episode. I cannot wait to see you back here next week for another episode. I hope that you have the most magical day, morning, evening, wherever you are in the world, and I will see you next week.
